is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
