Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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