It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
