so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
