great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
