it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
