What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
His hands were made for my vagina.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize
