we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
