didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
