So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
how does that bad decision feel?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
