he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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