Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
we're so committed to being not committed
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
