that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Randomize
