That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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