Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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