I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
