So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
