I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize