pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize