Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
