i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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