Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
where am i from again
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize