That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
you would pick up someone in the library
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
