absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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