I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
