Screwed.edu
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
