so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
