Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
