Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
