if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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