You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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