Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
