Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
