My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
