We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize