I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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