so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
