no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
