He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
a search helicopter?!
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Randomize
