I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
