ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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