She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
