i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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