Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
He better not be in your backpack
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
