Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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