I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
