Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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