i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
My penis needs a shock collar
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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