I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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