is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
